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Funny SMS Quotes and Funny Text Messages

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Funny SMS Quotes and Funny Text Messages

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SMS Quote | Text Message #98
1 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 5 (1 votes)

Psst..2lg knb? My gs2 sna akong sbhn sau. Kc knina, my lumapt skn. Nagulat nga aq e.. Tps, Wla lng Un lng, nagulat lng aq,kains nga e. Cge 2log kna ulet. =p xandra

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0 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 5 - 0.00% (0 votes)
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Date: Mon, Mar, 23, 2009
Time: 8:52 am
Sent by: dirtyoldman
Category: Adult, Conversations
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QRcode:9552

SMS Quote Text Message #5557
March 23, 2009

HUSBAND: Read that women are insecure about their weight, butt, and breast sizes.

WIFE: Oh, yeah? Well, we can diet, have liposuction, exercise, and even get implants for all that. What can a man do about the one area that we all KNOW he feels insecure about?


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0 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 5 - 0.00% (0 votes)
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Date: Mon, Mar, 23, 2009
Time: 8:51 am
Sent by: dirtyoldman
Category: Funny
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QRcode:9551

SMS Quote Text Message #5556
March 23, 2009

A husband explains to the guys at the bar…

‘Do you know why I left her? She started to use four-letter words like:
Find Work!’


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0 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 5 - 0.00% (0 votes)
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Date: Fri, Mar, 20, 2009
Time: 9:08 am
Sent by: dirtyoldman
Category: Conversations
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QRcode:9539

SMS Quote Text Message #5552
March 20, 2009

Husband: Naku dear. Ang ganda ng trabahong nakita ko. Taas ng sweldo, daming benefits, me bonus pa!
Wife: Swerte mo talaga Honey. At last!
Husband:Swerte talaga! Pwede ka na raw mag-start next week!


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0 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 5 - 0.00% (0 votes)
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Date: Fri, Mar, 20, 2009
Time: 9:07 am
Sent by: dirtyoldman
Category: Conversations
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QRcode:9538

SMS Quote Text Message #5551
March 20, 2009

MAN TO PSYCHIATRIST:
‘You have to help me, Doctor. I’m starting to believe I’m a woman.’

PSYCHIATRIST: ‘Why do you think that?’

MAN: ‘It was something my gynecologist said to me the other day.’


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0 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 5 - 0.00% (0 votes)
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Date: Fri, Mar, 20, 2009
Time: 9:07 am
Sent by: dirtyoldman
Category: Adult
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QRcode:9537

SMS Quote Text Message #5550
March 20, 2009

‘And what was the extent of the defendant’s involvement in this matter?’ the judge asked the woman in a paternity case.

She replies, ‘Oh, about 10 inches.’


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0 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 5 - 0.00% (0 votes)
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Date: Fri, Mar, 20, 2009
Time: 9:05 am
Sent by: dirtyoldman
Category: Conversations
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QRcode:9536

SMS Quote Text Message #5549
March 20, 2009

Man sits down at the bar, orders a drink and holds his head in his hands.

BARTENDER: Hey, pal, what’s happenin?

MAN: I’m in deep shit. I just got caught screwing my neighbor.

BARTENDER: Oh wow! Who caught you? Your wife?

MAN: No, HIS wife!


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0 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 50 votes, average: 0.00 out of 5 - 0.00% (0 votes)
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Date: Fri, Mar, 20, 2009
Time: 9:04 am
Sent by: dirtyoldman
Category: Conversations
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QRcode:9535

SMS Quote Text Message #5548
March 20, 2009

Sa isang ospital…

Misis: Doc!… Doc!… Doc!..

Doktor: Anu po yun, misis?

Misis: Doc, paki tingnan naman ang anak ko, nangingitim.

Doctor: Ay!! Huwag po kayong mag-alala kasi ang anak ninyo ITA.


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Date: Thu, Mar, 19, 2009
Time: 8:53 am
Sent by: dirtyoldman
Category: Funny
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QRcode:9527

SMS Quote Text Message #5544
March 19, 2009

Read this in a car’s bumper sticker – DON’T STEAL. THE GOVERNMENT DOES NOT NEED COMPETITION.

 
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