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SMS Quote Text Message #5575

dirtyoldman — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 00:40:00 +0000

Did you know that for every 200 people that you meet on the street everyday.. 2 of them are ghosts? -Reader’s Digest Add TxtBuff on Facebook now!

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SMS Quote Text Message #5559

dirtyoldman — Mon, 23 Mar 2009 00:53:10 +0000

Tip for a Long Life: Huwag isusulat ang name mo sa condolence book pag dumadalaw ka sa patay kasi pagkatapos ng libing, merong raffle kung sino ang isusunod! Add TxtBuff on Facebook now!

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SMS Quote Text Message #5486

dirtyoldman — Sat, 07 Mar 2009 00:37:20 +0000

John & Mary Hill crashed their car & were pronounced DOA. While playing her CD, the nurse noticed the couple tapping their fingers to the rhythm of the music. She ran & shouted “DOC!, DOC!” “WHAT IS IT?” said the doctor. “Doc, you wont believe this! The Hills are alive! With the sound of music!” Add [...]

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SMS Quote | Text Message #5255

vivs — Tue, 27 Jan 2009 15:42:09 +0000

May 10,1976 nsgasaan ang 1 mtndng ba2e,pro tnkbuhan ng nksgasa.Bgo mmtay ang mtnda tnuran nia”alaw ina magnat”,isang itim na dsal.S lht ng nkbsa n2 mgppkta ang mtnda ng 3 bses ng mdling araw! Ta2bi sau duguan at humhngi ng 2long! Nangyri i2 kay MARKY CIELLO ng STARSTRUCK dhl ndi nia naipsa s 17 tao nmty xa araw na dec 07 08 11:15 hnd sya nagicng.Sori klangn q ipsa kc ayn
s research 22o i2!naiplabas na 2 s NGINIG.

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SMS Quote | Text Message #4679

dirtyoldman — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 00:00:45 +0000

A guy went to the toilet and sat on the throne, then he heard someone came in the next cubicle. The guy in the next cubicle started talking to him.

‘Pare, kamusta na?’ He hesistantly replied, ‘Ah, OK lang.’

He asked again, ‘Anong ginagawa mo diyan?’

Unknowing what to say he answered, ‘Eto, ume-ebs.’

Again the guy speaks, ‘Pare, tawagan kita mamaya, may sumasagot dito sa tabi ko!’

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SMS Quote | Text Message #4632

dirtyoldman — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 23:50:34 +0000

IsAnG iNa AnG NaGsiLaNg Ng PaGkApAnGiT pangiT Na sAnGgOl… InA: iSa XaNg KaYaMaNaN… AmA: oO NgA.. iBa0n na NaTin! Add TxtBuff on Facebook now!

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SMS Quote | Text Message #4440

dirtyoldman — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 23:29:31 +0000

Insyd d elevator, der ws a Nurse & a girl..

Suddnly, d door of d elevator opens.
Dey saw a boy rushing 2 ride insde bt d Nurse closed d elev8or immedi8ly.

D grl got curious & askd d Nurse:
“Y did u do dat?”

D Nurse replied:
“I know him!
He’s 1 of our patients hu died ystrday.
Did u see dat red tag on his wrist? We put red tags on dead patients!”

D girl raised her wrist & asked..

“Like this?!”

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SMS Quote | Text Message #4416

chelle — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 13:31:51 +0000

Bago ka matulog:

pansinin mo naman ang matandang nakaitim sa pintuan ng kwarto mo..

ingat sa pagkilos baka madaganan mo ang batang nasa ilalim ng kumotmo…

kumusta naman ang babaeng nasa loob ng cabinet mo duguan pa rin ba..?

Ang lalaking nakabarong sa unan mo natagpuan na ba ang ulo nya..?

Napapansin mo bang sobrang tahimik ng kapaligiran wala kang maririnig kundi ungol ng mga di matahimik na kaluluwa..

Cge tulog ka na Gud nyt!..ingat!

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SMS Quote | Text Message #4018

dirtyoldman — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 23:35:08 +0000

Feels gr8
2b in bed
waitng4sleep
2cum
as sum1
gently rubs
ur bak,

up 2
ur nek,

ur ears,

den u hear
a soft whsper..

HNAPN MO
NMN PUMATAY
SAKEN!

aw0o0!

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SMS Quote | Text Message #3704

mama_prito — Fri, 13 Jun 2008 06:11:26 +0000

ScAriest thing
ab0ut having
a teddy bear,

is when you hug it tight..

and it suddenly hugs y0u back. Haha! Lag0t . Hapi friday d 13th. Hehe

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SMS Quote | Text Message #3565

dirtyoldman — Thu, 29 May 2008 01:32:22 +0000

A guy walks into a library and says to the prim librarian, “Excuse me, Miss, do you have books on suicide?” To which, she stops her tasks, looks at him over the top of her glasses, and says, “Fuck off, you bugger, you won’t bring it back!” Add TxtBuff on Facebook now!

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SMS Quote | Text Message #3539

dirtyoldman — Mon, 26 May 2008 02:07:50 +0000

LaLaki nkataLi ang leeg nakabitin sa kahoy sa tabi ng iLog, gusto mag suicide. NabaLi ang sanga, nahuLog sa iLog, Lumangoy! LALAKI: Hay! Salamat di ako naLunod! Add TxtBuff on Facebook now!

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SMS Quote | Text Message #3244

dirtyoldman — Fri, 18 Apr 2008 01:15:14 +0000

Lawyer: Would you please tell the court why did you shoot your husband with bow and arrow? Wife: I didn’t want to wake up the children and the neighbors. Add TxtBuff on Facebook now!

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SMS Quote | Text Message #3179

dirtyoldman — Mon, 14 Apr 2008 00:45:17 +0000

A farmer’s horse kicked the farmer’s mother-in-law to death. A large crowd, mostly men, turned out for the funeral. The priest remarked that the old lady must have been highly popular. An onlooker replied that most of the men were there to buy the horse. ;> Add TxtBuff on Facebook now!

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SMS Quote | Text Message #2957

dirtyoldman — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 15:29:08 +0000

There was once a young Pinay who used dynamite for a phallus… They found her pussy in Batanes and part of her asshole in Jolo. Hehehe… Add TxtBuff on Facebook now!

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SMS Quote | Text Message #2945

dirtyoldman — Fri, 15 Feb 2008 15:21:48 +0000

May isng baliw,cnma ng knyang doktor s tulay ng ilog pasig upng sbukan kung mgling na,nkkta cla ng nlu2n0d agd n cngip ng bliw ang nlu2n0d tpos tnali s leeg at cnbit s 2lay.
Dok:bkit m tnli s leeg dpat mawt to mawt rcetati0n ang gnwa m0,
baliw:dok kylangan ptiktikan q muna kc bsang bsa cia.

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